tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-57626146819843746462024-03-12T23:03:39.769-07:00A Well-Balanced Mom?KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.comBlogger29125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-19798500221952305682015-09-04T19:50:00.003-07:002015-09-04T19:50:44.924-07:00Why Walk in the Buddy Walk?<span style="-webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; font-size: 17px; text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">Why walk for Down Syndrome awareness?</span><br />
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It's Buddy Walk time! If you would like to join Mer's Bears at the Lehigh Valley Buddy Walk on Saturday, September 26, at 2 pm, <a href="http://lehighvalleybw.donordrive.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=donorDrive.teamParticipants&teamID=5028" target="_blank">sign up now</a>!</div>
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If you're not sure WHY we do the Buddy Walk, you're probably not alone. In fact, there are times when I wonder too. Here's why I am walking this year:</div>
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I am walking for health! We are extremely fortunate that Meredith has not had any major health concerns related to Down syndrome. Unfortunately, this is not the case for many children, many of who undergo heart surgery at a very young age. The Eastern PA Down Syndrome Center helps parents manage the medical concerns associated with Down syndrome from the beginning and serves as a resource for questions and connections to therapists as developmental questions arise. We also walk because we CAN walk! Did you know that one of the major challenges children with Ds encounter is hypotonia, or loose, floppy muscles? This is why children with Ds need the support of physical, occupational, and even speech therapists (because the tongue is a muscle!) to develop skills typically developing children pick up much faster. It was not so long ago that new parents of children with Ds would be told that their child would never learn to walk or talk...and thus many were institutionalized. The early intervention of therapy (beginning as early as about 6 weeks!) has played a major role in helping kids with Ds develop these skills more quickly...so much so that Meredith could probably dance her way through this walk! </div>
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I am walking for advocacy. As Meredith enters kindergarten, in a mainstream classroom in our community school, with a one to one teaching assistant, I can't help but think we have won the educational jackpot. She is getting the supports she needs in the social and academic environment that is appropriate for her! I also can't help but think about what special education was like when I was in school...how students with any disabilities were isolated from their peers and often not even exposed to the academic curriculum...and how their parents might have been thrilled just because they were allowed to BE in school at all. Today, we benefit from their fights, their tears, their work for inclusion in the schools and in the community. We walk gratefully for the advocacy done by previous generations and with a promise to do more for the next generation.</div>
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I am walking for community. Being a child with a disability can be lonely. Being a parent of a child with a disability can be lonely too. The Eastern PA Down Syndrome Center builds a network for families of children with Down syndrome to support each other with issues specifically related to this aspect of our lives. The other community is more important though: we are so lucky to have friends who include our family in birthday parties, play dates, dance activities, and chatter after school. If you don't know us well, yet, come join us at the walk! </div>
KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-80068512358574006612014-03-21T11:38:00.002-07:002014-03-21T11:38:42.516-07:00World Down Syndrome DayToday, March 21, is World Down Syndrome Day. If you're wondering, "Why today?" it's because the date is 3-21...3 copies of the 21st chromosome...get it?!<br />
Anyway, this morning, as I wondered what to do to celebrate and spread awareness, I thought about person-first language and about something I hope you already know to be true for yourself: No one descriptor, no single role, defines who you are.<br />
The same is true for Meredith.<br />
So, in the spirit of the day and celebrating all 47 of her chromosomes, I offer you 47 ways she might describe herself.<br />
<br />
<ol>
<li>She reads voraciously.</li>
<li>She dances any time of day.</li>
<li>She tucks her baby dolls in for nap.</li>
<li>She wakes up early.</li>
<li>She pushes her bedtime.</li>
<li>She spins in circles while she sleeps.</li>
<li>She scribbles with crayons.</li>
<li>And sometimes she bites them. </li>
<li>She amuses her brother with peek-a-boo.</li>
<li>She cooks eggs with her dad for breakfast.</li>
<li>She folds laundry with her mom.</li>
<li>She writes the alphabet on her iPad.</li>
<li>She hugs the vacuum cleaner.</li>
<li>She cheers for women's basketball.</li>
<li>She watches Sesame Street.</li>
<li>But she prefers Super Why.</li>
<li>She reserves the right to be particular about her food.</li>
<li>She wants soft pretzels.</li>
<li>She asks to be excused after meals.</li>
<li>And then she stacks the chairs at her table.</li>
<li>She swings.</li>
<li>She slides.</li>
<li>She puzzles.</li>
<li>She blows bubbles</li>
<li>She squishes Play-Doh.</li>
<li>She accepts bribes of stickers.</li>
<li>And chocolate.</li>
<li>She knows the letters of the alphabet.</li>
<li>She counts--sometimes with all of the numbers and sometimes by the "skip a few" method.</li>
<li>She likes bandaids on her boo-boos.</li>
<li>She kisses other people's boo-boos to make them "all better."</li>
<li>She sings in the stroller.</li>
<li>She sings in the car seat.</li>
<li>She sings while she's getting her hair dried.</li>
<li>She attends preschool.</li>
<li>She makes a plan--it's usually "table tops."</li>
<li>She thrives on routine.</li>
<li>She bends into super flexible positions.</li>
<li>She listens and follows directions.</li>
<li>She ignores directions and pitches a fit. </li>
<li>She anticipates Thursdays for our trips to the library and dance class.</li>
<li>She shops at Target.</li>
<li>She shares her toys with her brother.</li>
<li>She snatches toys away from her brother.</li>
<li>She apologizes with a hug and a kiss.</li>
<li>She dotes on her cousins.</li>
<li>She has Down syndrome. </li>
</ol>
Down syndrome is a part of her life, and of all of our lives, but it is only a part. And, when you compare it to all the other things she DOES, this thing she "has" really isn't that exciting.<br />
So today, help spread awareness about Down syndrome. Make a donation to a support organization. Listen to a new parent talk about their joys and challenges. Read a book about Down syndrome to kids. And remember that no single label...Down syndrome or otherwise...tells the whole story about who a person is.<br />
<br />
<br />KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-67037436692000391672013-07-15T20:00:00.003-07:002013-07-15T20:00:25.470-07:00Rebalancing Meals Anyone who has had the pleasure of dining with us knows that meal times with the Meyer family are, in short, stressful. Though we are not at a point where Meredith is eating like a typically developing 3 year old, we have made great progress in the last year and learned a lot about what helps a meal time be successful FOR US. I share this in the hopes that it might help someone else who is struggling with eating issues--either by providing thoughts on a new approach or simply by providing comfort in knowing that you are not alone and that it will get better.<br />
Originally had these great dreams of cooking all our own baby food and being quite natural about we fed Meredith. We pureed peaches and pears, tried making our own oatmeal from oats instead of using the boxed stuff, and introduced solids to Meredith at about 6 months. Looking back, I can say with absolute certainty that SHE WAS NOT READY. Even with a special chair provided by the physical therapist and multiple suggestions from a speech therapist, many of the bites that went in, came right back out. By the time she was a year old, she was finally starting to swallow purees, but meal time was literally show-time at our house. We sang songs constantly while spoon feeding her and even employed those cute little singing stuffed animals as distractions for when we just couldn't do another verse of Old MacDonald's Farm on our own. This worked for a while--by which I mean Meredith built up a repetoire of about 6-8 pureed foods that she ate--but we pretty much stalled there.<br />
Somewhere over the course of introducing foods, Meredith learned to eat marshmallows...and we rejoiced! We thought they would be the key to introducing puffs and Cheerios and yogurt melts--all the typical first finger foods for toddlers--but, unfortunately, they were just marshmallows. A much loved treat, but not the gateway snack we hoped they would be.<br />
When Meredith was about 2, we finally pushed for and received help from an occupational therapist to address the sensory issues we were fairly certain were the underlying cause of Meredith's struggles with eating. At about that same time last summer, though, as we prepared for our move to Pennsylvania, between us being busy, stressed parents and Meredith being stressed by our stress and distraction, she not only failed to make any progress with foods but regressed to eating pretty much just yogurt.<br />
Luckily, with our move to Pennsylvania, Meredith's therapy schedule increased and she was paired with an occupational therapist (OT) who has an incredible amount of experience working with children (and parents) who are experiencing feeding difficulties. Here is a summary of what I have learned:<br />
<ul>
<li>There is a heirarchy of tolerance regarding food--see, touch, smell, taste (or lick) and then eat. Children first need to literally be able to accept that a new food is going to sit on their plate and stay there. Then they need to touch it to learn what it feels like--they have to be comfortable with what it feels like on their hands before they will be comfortable with it in their mouth. Then they need to smell it--some smells might be really offensive to certain kids at first. They they need to be allowed to lick or taste the food without any pressure to actually consume it. Eventually, once they master that, they may be ready to try eating the food. Certain steps will be more critical to your routine depending on your child's needs and where they are with eating in general...lower level steps will be more important to a child just learning to eat than one who is more comfortable trying new things. However, there will be days where some or all of these steps need to be re-emphasized even with foods your child ate without a problem the day before. (Touch is big for us! We often find that if Mer refuses a familiar food, it is helpful to ask her to finger feed a bit to one of us--messy, but it encourages her to touch the food without being asked to eat it. Often, after one turn for Mom or Dad, she is ready to take a turn eating the food herself.)</li>
<li>Kids need to know exactly what they are expected to do when they put food in their mouths...and what will happen to the food. This was the first BIG key to success for us...I sat and watched as our OT picked up a bite of a veggie straw and put it on her tongue. She then showed Meredith how she moved the bite over to her molars and crunched on it with her teeth. She had Mer listen to the crunch she made and made a big deal over the sound--"Listen, it crunches!" She also specifically pointed out the "chewing teeth"--both on herself and on Meredith--so she would know not to try to chew food with her front teeth. For a long time we practiced with crunchy food--beginning with yogurt melts broken into thirds and veggie straws and pretzels. Then we introduced squishy foods--like yogurt covered raisins and dried blueberries. Other things have come along since then, but all are generally classified as "squishy" or "crunchy" before being eaten.</li>
<li>Sauces are amazing--we have been fairly successful at using sauces, such as ketchup, bar-b-que sauce, and Nutella to bridge the gap between similar foods. For example, hot dogs were the first meat that we introduced Meredith to--and we did so covered in ketchup. Since then, we've added sausage, meatballs, and ravioli (not a meat, but a main dish) all covered in ketchup. When I recently introduced chicken nuggets, I said something to the effect of, "We're going to try this. It's chicken nuggets--it's a meat, like a hot dog, and we're going to eat it with ketchup," and it went quite well! Sauces can also soften and hide the texture of foods--like the crust of chicken nuggets--letting your child be successful with a new food while softening some of the challenges it might present. The amount of sauce you use can always be reduced as your child gets more familiar with the food itself.</li>
<li>Introduce foods that are similar to something your child already eats in some way---color, texture, shape. </li>
<li>Offer really small bites of new foods or foods with funny textures. Really small. Like can only fit on one tine of a fork small. More than that might be overwhelming to your child's mouth. </li>
<li>Begin the meal with foods your child feels comfortable with and serve as a warm up to the meal. For example, we started all meals with 3 or 4 "crunchies" of some sort (yogurt melts or veggie straws) for a long time. This was a "safe" food that got Meredith used to the idea that she was going to be chewing things that would crumble in her mouth during the meal. If she is trying a new food or is particularly resistant to a food at a certain time for any reason, we often go back and try this again and then move on to the new food.</li>
<li>Be aware of the level of other sensory input in the room. For ages, I thought Meredith didn't like crunchy or crumbly foods. As it turns out, she does--they just provided input that she didn't know what to do with. Yogurt provided almost no input--it was so smooth--so she had very little to react to and could eat it anywhere, regardless of how loud or busy the place she was eating was. In fact, our singing probably allowed her to almost forget she was eating at all because it distracted her from what she was doing. (Yogurt is, by the way, still the back-up food at daycare where she eats with 10 other 2-year-olds!) However, if she is eating in a familiar, relatively quiet place, she is more likely to be able to handle the sensory input of foods with texture--and it provides enough input that she doesn't need a lot of distraction to eat. In fact, if you try to get her to eat foods she is only partially comfortable with at a loud, busy place, she is likely to not even tolerate the food on her plate.</li>
<li>Keep in mind that meal time is work and is stressful for your child--and
it shouldn't all have to be therapy. Some days you'll try new
things--others you'll go with the comfortable favorites. Some days your
child will work on physically feeding herself--other days you'll man the
fork or spoon. </li>
<li>Don't make meal time a fight. You hear this everywhere, but it is so true. Set a timer--kids are probably only going to be engaged for about 20 minutes anyway and if you try to drag it out until they've eaten "enough", you're both going to be miserable. Celebrate small victories--let your child know how proud you are of them when they touch or taste a new food for the first time--even if it doesn't get swallowed! Make it funny--when food slips off the fork, talk about how silly that is, rather than groaning at all that wasted effort.</li>
<li>Focus on small goals that are important to you and your family. I would love Meredith to eat vegetables other than pickles, but right now it's more important to us that she learn to eat a few of the kid friendly meals offered at daycare and restaurants, like macaroni and hot dogs. This past February, as I was starting to think about Mer's upcoming third birthday, I decided I wanted her to be able to eat cake at her party--she had never really done much more than tolerate seeing it on her plate before. Our OT helped us build off of her love to chocolate to introduce chocolate chips in a cake and then really fudge-y brownies and finally chocolate cake before the big day so that she could be successful enjoying her own cake after the candles were blown out.</li>
</ul>
Meredith now eats pancakes with syrup (and some days Nutella) for breakfast and a meat and a fruit for most lunches and dinners at home. She is working on "poking" the bites on her plate with her fork by herself--she can do this by herself but it gets tiring and makes for a long meal. She currently drinks from a straw-bottle but is learning to drink from a cup with support. We have a ways to go, but I feel like we are making slow and steady progress toward her being able to eat appropriate food in an appropriate manner with her friends at the lunch table by the time she gets to kindergarten!<br />
<br />KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-20050629133593818152013-07-06T12:12:00.001-07:002013-07-06T12:12:13.877-07:00Re-BalancingIt has been so long since I've written, I don't even know where to begin.<br />
<br />
Well, maybe I do.<br />
<br />
I've been writing this post in my head for the last month at least, probably longer. So much about our lives has changed since January 21, 2012, which is, apparently, when I last posted. So, here's the plan: Today, I'll give you an update on WHY there's been much re-balancing in our lives and how that has affected me personally. Soon (hopefully this won't seem so daunting after today) I'll try to give you some updates on other areas of our lives.<br />
<br />
The long and the short of the spring of 2012 is that last June Greg accepted a job at Lafayette College in Easton, PA. On a personal level, we were thrilled with this opportunity since it is an area that we were already familiar with and it brought us closer to Greg's family. I should also mention that this job came with an offer of on-campus housing--a perk to be sure, but an adjustment that probably deserves its own post. (Re-balancing Living Space)<br />
<br />
I have to admit, though, that the move threw me for a loop. It brought with it all of the heartache typically associated with moves--saying goodbye to neighbors, friends, and colleagues, as well as my students (who I had planned to loop up to the next grade level with). My mantra quickly became, "How lucky I am to have worked (lived, played) with people who it is so hard to say goodbye to." But, it still hurt...<br />
<br />
Another shock came when, after being here for less than a week, I opened the newspaper to find out that the local school district was laying off ANOTHER 125 teachers after a previous 75 or more earlier that spring. There would be no hoping to fill a last-minute vacancy around here...<br />
<br />
In the spirit of making lemonade, though, this year has presented some definite perks.<br />
<ul>
<li>I learned that I like baking and got to do quite a bit of it!</li>
<li>We've made new friends and found that we have more babysitters available than we do date-nights. </li>
<li>I made my own schedule while substitute teaching in the local schools (a great way to really get to KNOW a school before you send kids there or work there). </li>
<li>With the help of some very understanding professors, I fast-tracked my reading degree and finished in May instead of this next December. </li>
<li>I enjoyed some slow days during my pregnancy with our son--no pre-planning weeks of lessons before delivery and no puking in the classroom bathroom this time around! </li>
<li>And, above all else, I got to stay home with Meredith two days a week. If there is anyone the move has been good for, it has been Mer Bear. (Re-balancing Support)</li>
</ul>
The "problem" is that all of this change has lead to a great Re-Balancing in my life and as the roles of my life change, I am wobbling...<br />
<br />
Wasn't I wobbling before?! <br />
<br />
<br />KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-711871968141103362012-01-21T20:23:00.000-08:002012-01-21T20:23:37.271-08:00Strong WomenSo, for those of you who don't know us well, in the past few years Greg and I have become big fans of JMU's women's basketball team. It all started the first year I was living here in Harrisonburg and we were trying to "get involved" in the community and the university.<br />
Since then, we've become slightly obsessed. Like, we joined the Crown Club, watch away games via the internet, and, of the 2 personal days I get from work this year, 1 will be used to go to the CAA women's basketball tournament in Maryland. If it's not obsession, it is, at least, commitment.<br />
I like the basketball games for a lot of reasons. It's a competition and a team to cheer. It's something to look forward to on winter evenings. It's a family friendly atmosphere at the games. It's a super deal (less than $100 for two adults for the year!).<br />
And, it's a super message being sent to my daughter.<br />
Watching women's basketball presents an in-your-face juxtaposition of what being a woman means.<br />
It's watching women in jerseys and tennis shoes race up and down the court for 40 minutes. During this time they run plays as a team and shoot foul shots all on their own. They scramble for rebounds and get the ball stolen out of their hands. They fly through the air gracefully and get pushed to the ground, catch some lucky breaks on foul-calls and get busted on others, make miracle 3-point shots at the buzzer and miss gimme layups. These are strong women, beautiful women, successful women, and yet their style of femininity flies in the face of everything girls are taught about being "lady-like" while they are growing up.<br />
However, when the buzzer sounds to signal a time-out, a totally different picture of femininity takes the court. As basketball players catch their breath and strategize the next play, cheerleaders take center court, jumping, flipping, and cheering their peers on toward victory. These women are as strong and agile as their ball-shooting counterparts: lifting each other up in the air, doing backflips from a dead stop in the middle of the floor, bending and stretching their legs into all sorts of shapes. Wearing make-up and ribbons in their hair, though, they present a much more typical picture of womanhood.<br />
What I want Meredith, and lots of little girls and boys, to know is that both represent an awesome way to be a woman--as do the many gradations of femininity between these two seemingly extreme positions. And, I want her to know that these two positions are not as far away from each other as they may seem. Both groups of women are healthy and active, involved in their community, well-educated, hard-working, and striving to be the best they can be as individuals and as a team. If that's not a positive message, I don't know what is!<br />KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-65725851151324112752012-01-17T18:14:00.000-08:002012-01-17T18:14:44.170-08:00Like squishing a bug...Maturity rears its ugly head again today...and it's like the day you finally squish the bug yourself.<br />
I remember receiving a call one summer evening when I was on vacation and my sister was staying at my apartment. She had barricaded herself in my bedroom and was calling to find out what to do next...a superbug of sort, maybe a flying cockroach, had made its way into the apartment and made my poor sister its next target. Sadly, from 2,000 miles away, there was not much anyone could do to help her except offer suggestions. It took a while, but being the brave, capable, independent young woman she is, she eventually solved the problem and was able to take full ownership of the apartment again. (For those wondering, I believe the solution involved an arsenol of household aerosol products--not exactly eco-friendly, but efficient.)<br />
Maturation is really just a series of events, like squishing bugs, that you are initially accustomed to passing off to someone else (your parents, a college roommate, your significant other) but that you eventually take responsibility for yourself. Laundry, dishes, and changing the toilet-paper roll are all little milestones on this list as well.<br />
Sick babies present opportunities for personal growth as well. At least, that's how I'm choosing to look at the situations that Little Mate Mer's tummy troubles presented today.<br />
Fingers crossed that there won't be any other such opportunities tonight and I can revert back to a younger, less responsible version of myself in the morning!KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-64959743288903407362011-11-15T17:25:00.001-08:002011-11-15T18:45:07.538-08:00"Thanks"giving: Catch-up!"Thanks"giving: Day 15: Dinner Out!<br />
A Tuesday night dinner out is always a treat, and, when it's Mexican food, all the better! Dinner with friends and their little girl tonight was awesome great...so nice to relax and chat about kids, work, etc. So grateful!<br />
<br />
"Thanks"giving: Day 14: Classes<br />
I'm so grateful for my writing classes on Thursday nights this semester. It's such a nice opportunity to talk to other teachers about the new things they're doing in their classes--there just isn't time for many of these conversations on a daily basis. I'm also grateful for the ongoing support and troubleshooting as I try using Writer's Workshop in my classroom this year.<br />
<br />
"Thanks"giving: Day 13: Text messages<br />
Actual conversation with the babysitters watching Meredith Saturday afternoon--<br />
Me (from my crazy out of area phone number): Just checking in...how's Mer doing? ~Katie<br />
Sitter (response in less than 30 seconds): Wrong number.<br />
My thoughts: Ok, minor panic, but, that's why we have 2 sitters, 2 phone numbers.<br />
Sitter (less than 1 minute from when initial message was sent): Oh, sorry...she just woke up from nap. Not eating much, but drinking her milk.<br />
Me: LOL...<br />
I really am grateful for the sitters we have worked with this semester...but I am just as happy to have had this conversation. It so made me smile! Even the tech-savy college kids make make bobbles from time to time.<br />
<br />
"Thanks"giving: Day 12: Visitors<br />
Loved having company this past weekend! It's nice to see family, hang out, and show them some of the sites of H'burg.<br />
<br />
"Thanks"giving: Day 11: Computer Lab<br />
It makes my Fridays so relaxing! :-)<br />
<br />
"Thanks"giving: Day 10: Special Educators<br />
So thankful for all of the wonderful people who work with Meredith and also provide support for Greg and me. They are our teachers, our resources, our coordinators, and our cheerleaders and their knowledge is absolutely amazing!KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-19352419579198084482011-11-09T19:06:00.000-08:002011-11-09T19:06:47.744-08:00"Thanks"giving: Day 9: MusicI can't name the artist for any song on the radio and I haven't bought new music (CDs, MP3s, anything) in ages. However, I truly enjoy music and it is what I am thankful for tonight.<div>
If I have to drive anywhere by myself (a task I would dread), you can bet that I will spend the entire car ride belting out the lyrics to my favorite musical tunes.</div>
<div>
If I'm taking a long walk during the summer, I'm keeping pace to my IPOD.</div>
<div>
And, if I'm hangin' out at home with a song stuck in my head, I will be "singing" aloud, making up the words as I go, and often adjusting them to meet the situation at hand...</div>
<div>
Overheard recently in our dining room:</div>
<div>
"Yummy yogurt, yummy yogurt; tastes so good--like it should. Mer can eat it every day, and the doc says that's okay. Yum, yum, yum. Yum, yum, yum."</div>
<div>
I am thankful for music, though, because I can tell already that Meredith loves it as well. She visibly perks up to music and is even learning to "dance." She has learned a lot of the signs for her favorite songs, like "Wheels on the Bus" and "Itsy Bitsy Spider." Often, the only way we can get her to eat is by singing--thus the yogurt song above. </div>
<div>
The other nice thing about music is that it is so easy to find a variety of musical performances, at relatively low cost, that are fairly kid-friendly. And, so, a super-special shout-out to the staff and students who put on the musical and reader's theatre performance at our school tonight--Meredith loved it! Thank you for helping make our evening so enjoyable!</div>KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-89795289220684194602011-11-08T19:22:00.000-08:002011-11-08T19:23:00.735-08:00"Thanks"giving: Day 8: A Meredith MorningThis morning I am thankful for "A Meredith Morning." Conferences at school don't start until 11, so I get to spend a *little* extra time with my baby this morning. What a treat for a Tuesday morning!<br />
After dropping Greg off at work, we returned home to watch the first segment of Sesame Street and to play in the living room. The "word on the street" today was canteen, so that may have been what inspired Meredith to focus on my to-go coffee cup that I was still sipping out of as we watched. She scooted after the mug wherever I moved it, trying to get her own fair share of a morning pick-me-up. Then, she stood up at her play and learn table and started to work on cruising from one little stool-type contraption to another. We even had enough time this morning for me to give Meredith a bottle and read a couple of books. What a treat! It was a nice enough morning that I (almost!) wish conferences would come a little more often so that I could spend more mornings with my baby girl!KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-57077215592598752712011-11-08T19:11:00.001-08:002011-11-08T19:11:42.621-08:00"Thanks"giving: Day 7: GregWords really cannot describe how thankful I am for my husband. In the 9 (OMG!) years I've known him, he has grown from an R.A. programming buddy to my partner for life. His logistical side keeps our bills paid, our schedule on-time, and our budget balanced--despite my best efforts. His strong work ethic means that he often leads the effort on everything from starting the laundry to cleaning the toilets. His hobbies include cooking and reading--dinner is healthy and educational with him around. He is thoughtful--buying gifts because they remind him of that person, not because it's a holiday. He is level headed--he doesn't stress out over the little bobbles in life. He is loving--he never misses a "kissortunity." He is a great father. And he is a good friend. He is my husband, in whom I am well-pleased. And whom I am grateful to have in my life.KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-66931859949015202282011-11-07T19:35:00.000-08:002011-11-07T19:35:46.990-08:00"Thanks"giving: Day 6: Morning coffeeI've been hooked on coffee since I was a little girl and my dad started fixing me coffee like my mom's...with milk and sugar. Then I only drank it on the weekend, usually while snuggled in their bed reading the comics or watching Saturday morning cartoons. However, there was never any doubt for me that coffee would become a staple in my life.<br />
As I've grown up, I've gone through stages with coffee...<br />
--the late at night at Starbucks phase in high school<br />
--the flavored Wawa coffee in Fairmart while studying for midterms phase<br />
--the "1 cup and only on weekends" phase when pregnant with Mer<br />
and, NOW, the "two big cups, every day" phrase I'm currently in. I'm not necessarily proud of this increasingly addictive habit, but I also figure that of all the substances I could get hooked on, caffeine's not so bad.<br />
So, tonight I am thankful for my coffee...and I'm thankful for my husband who makes it every day for me, even though he is currently kicking the habit.KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-60721889402588289712011-11-07T19:21:00.000-08:002011-11-07T19:21:59.610-08:00"Thanks"giving: Day 5: SkypeBeing away from family is never easy, but technology has been a great blessing for those of us trying to communicate with loved ones literally half-way around the world. Leading the list of inventions I'm grateful for in this area is Skype.<br />
With my parents living in Australia, Skype has been the glue that allows us to have "face-to-face" conversations on a weekly basis. Most of the time we spend our time just catching up...the kind of talk we'd all like to have over a glass of wine and a plate of nachos. Due to the time difference, though, only one set of us ever gets to have wine at a time...the others are still starting their day with a cup of coffee. When we're not just chatting, Skype also lets my parents watch their granddaughter as she grows and develops in the time between their visits. She tries on clothes they send and pets the cat. Together they sing "Itsy-Bitsy Spider" and play "Peek-a-boo." These are the kind of moments that just couldn't happen over the phone...they're the kind of thing that is only possible when you realize that eye-contact can be achieved via web-cam.<br />
Though they're much closer, my in-laws in Philadelphia also love Skype for the sneak-peek they get into Meredith's life--apparently the number one rule of grandparenting is "you can't see your grandchildren enough."KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-63727473104350298722011-11-06T17:50:00.000-08:002011-11-06T17:50:08.317-08:00"Thanks"giving: Day 4: String cheeseMeredith eats things. She eats blocks, and books, and the tv remote control. However, she distinguishes between toys and food with an uncanny sort of sixth sense. With almost unfailing accuracy, she refuses to bring anything consumable to her mouth.<br />
UNTIL THIS WEEKEND.<br />
This week, amid the ever-present but recently more anxiety-ridden battle called "Mealtime at the Meyer's"- a breakthrough occurred. Spinning off the idea that Meredith loves to put the little ribbons from her baby toys in her mouth, we served her the most ribbon-like food imaginable--plain spaghetti! This met with moderate, reserved success. She picked it up and put it in her mouth. She played with it, broke it into pieces, and put it into her mouth several more times before eventually sacrificing it by throwing it onto the floor as a peace-offering to the dog.<br />
Clearly we were on to something. Now, only one question remained: "How do we get Mer to swallow some of the food?"<br />
Luckily, it didn't take very many glances in the refrigerator before we realized the potential of STRING CHEESE.<br />
Slimy and smooth, like its spaghetti counterpart, string cheese never crumbles on to Meredith tongue with a rough sensation that results in automatic raspberries. String cheese is also long enough that Mer can grasp it easily, and it is flexible enough that it can wiggle into her mouth even if her aim is not dead-on. Unlike spaghetti, though, string cheese has TASTE.<br />
Upon discovering the pleasures of mozzarella string cheese, Meredith promptly ate/played with an entire stick work of strings.<br />
It may not sound like much to you, but to us it is a major battle won! Meredith independently fed herself some food!<br />
Now, my next question--what else comes in string form?<br />
*Written on September 11, 2011. However, my fond feelings for string-cheese have only increased since then, making me feel the need to include it in my list of thankfulness.KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-61968093933490580502011-11-06T17:35:00.000-08:002011-11-06T17:35:27.566-08:00"Thanks"giving: Day 3: My jobSo, it's not payday or anything, but, while I'm feeling upbeat about my class and school, I need to share how thankful I am for my job.<br />
First, in today's economy and with the ever-increasing cuts to school budgets, I am grateful just to have a job. Yes, the pay could be greater and the paperwork could be less, but I guess that's why they call it work.<br />
Second, I am grateful to have a job that I love. I am genuinely excited to go in to work and see 21 (or 22 tomorrow!) smiling 5-year-old faces staring back at me. For goodness sake, they are on a never-ending search for the word "the" and come show me every single time they find it. (And in kindergarten books, they find it a lot!) Their energy feeds mine, and exhausts mine, but there is never a boring moment.<br />
Finally, I am grateful for the support I have from the other adults in my school. I have AWESOME support with all the behind-the-scenes work that goes in to actually making the classroom function on a daily basis: stuffing folders, making copies, small group remediation, math assessments, and classroom management. Wow! I am blessed! I also have a fair amount of professional freedom at my job--freedom that many teachers are losing as districts hope that scripted programs will result in higher test scores. Finally, I feel I have support in my personal life from my colleagues and supervisors. That makes coming to work so much easier.<br />
It's not that I'm willing to forego my paycheck, but yes, I am grateful for my job!<br />
<br />
*Note: written on Thursday in class. I'm playing a bit of catch up tonight.*KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-78515284045949198062011-11-02T20:13:00.000-07:002011-11-02T20:13:48.356-07:00"Thanks"giving: Day 2: Morning walksSo, I'm crazy, but I love it!<br />
My feet hit the floor only two rings into the much more typical extended version of my snooze alarm routine. By 5:30, my shoes were on, the cat was fed, and Ruffy and I were out the door for our morning walk. There are lots of stars still in the sky at 5:30 in the morning, and there's also lots of time to think. Quietly.<br />
Sometimes I reflect on conversations from the night before. Sometimes I focus on the schedule for the afternoon or the upcoming weekend. Often, I think about my lessons for the day. (sigh)<br />
But, in any case, during my 15 or 20 minute spin around the block with the dog, I get time all to myself. I'm not answering questions or redirecting behavior. I'm not rushing to pick people up on time or make an appointment. I'm not even checking email or posting on Facebook. These few minutes feel stolen, like somehow I'm taking advantage of time the rest of the world doesn't even know exists.<br />
When I return to the house, the day will have begun. Greg will be fixing Mer's breakfast and we'll be watching every tock of the clock to make sure we get out the door on time for work. But, because of my little morning stretch-of-the-legs, I will be filled with the necessary energy and peace to make it through the day...until the next walk!<br />
For this I am thankful.<br />
<br />KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-4563358689144341122011-11-01T19:39:00.000-07:002011-11-01T19:39:17.712-07:00"Thanks" giving: Day 1-TimeThere's nothing like the first day of the month to make you realize how quickly the last month just went by. When the month is November, like TODAY, you also realize how quickly the next month, or two, are going to go by.<br />
AND THEN YOU PANIC!<br />
But stop. These are two of the most special, most memorable, most fun months of the year. Think of all the awesome things you get to do in the next 60 days. I am looking forward to:<br />
<br />
<ul><li>cheering for football teams</li>
<li>seeing family</li>
<li>seeing friends from college</li>
<li>baking pies</li>
<li>having a Thanksgiving feast for 5 year-olds</li>
<li>eating potatoes any way you can serve them</li>
<li>waking up REALLY early to shop</li>
<li>celebrating an upcoming wedding</li>
<li>cheering for basketball teams</li>
<li>"sing"ing in a school variety show</li>
<li>baking Christmas cookies</li>
<li>taking Meredith to see Santa</li>
<li>eating latkes and jelly donuts--and anything else fried you can think of!</li>
<li>making gingerbread cookies</li>
<li>seeing more family</li>
<li>skiing</li>
<li>and much more!</li>
</ul>There's no doubt the next two months will be crazy! But, just listing all of the above things made me smile.<br />
When things get busy, and I know they will, I hope I can take a step back and reflect on how special and memorable this season really is. Time may seem short, but it's really just being filled to the brim with fun.<br />
So, tonight, I am thankful for time. I am thankful for the quiet moments, like this, that I get to myself, and I am thankful for the busy moments, bursting with energy, creating memories that I can enjoy now and for years to come.KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-1522202647091567062011-05-23T18:42:00.000-07:002011-05-23T18:42:56.418-07:00Being a grown-up STINKSThere are moments when it's hard for me to think of myself as a adult. Even with car payments, doctors' visits, a mortgage, and work, the feeling doesn't always sink in. But, two events within the last 72 hours have smacked my husband and I upside the head...well, nose really...in such a way that we've had no choice but to embrace adulthood. And, I've gotta tell you, this time it stinks.<br />
It all began on Friday evening, at my in-laws' house in Pennsylvania. We had just gotten into town and were settling in for the evening...by about 11:30, Bubby and Zeyda (Meredith's grandparents) had gotten a sufficient number of hugs to allow her to go to bed for the evening, and Greg and I were exhausted. I took Mer upstairs to get jammies on and begin the bedtime routine while Greg let Ruffy out into the backyard one more time before bed. This is crucial. Ruffy, being a townhome dweller, is not used to the freedom that comes with backyards, and my in-laws' backyard offers the additional perk of housing bunnies in the bushes and under the storage sheds. Though Ruffy is a well-trained sleep-through-the-night-and-even-sleep-late-on-weekends dog, if he is not allowed enough "outside time" in Pennsylvania, he will wake us up multiple times during the middle of the night, begging to be let outside to chase the bunnies. <br />
Friday evening, however, Ruffy did not find bunnies in the bushes.<br />
He found a skunk.<br />
And the skunk found him.<br />
This is how, at midnight Friday night, as some people were anticipating the end of the world, Greg and I stood on his parents' porch, scrubbing the skunk smell off our dog.<br />
<br />
Skip ahead to this evening...Monday. Exhausted from traveling this weekend. Observation this morning. Faculty meeting this afternoon. Stressing as I duck out early to go to swim lessons with Meredith. I'm walking in the doors of UREC, ready to race into the locker room, change into my suit, and meet Greg and Mer for lessons in the pool when my phone starts ringing. <br />
It's Greg.<br />
"Turn your butt around," he says. "We have had major CDF. No swimming tonight."<br />
As it turns out, swimmy diapers and no poops from Meredith this weekend have combined with a game-changing result...catastrophic diaper failure. As Meredith babbles into the mirror and plays with her toys in her carseat, she is slowly ensuring that poop has touched the surface of everything within her reach.<br />
The process that ensures when we get home is eerily similar to which occured Friday night, except that we allow Meredith the modesty of getting hosed down in the tub instead of on the porch. <br />
<br />
The thing, besides the smell, that sticks with me after these events is the calm, matter-of-fact, yet immediate way we deal with these situations. I must say, I believe we deserve a pat on the back. There is no panic, no arguing, not even any attempt to delay the inevitable in the vain hope that some magical little fairies will come take care of the really messy parts for us. <br />
Baths must happen. <br />
Laundry must be done. <br />
Situations must be handled no matter how tired you are. And smiles and a little good-natured teasing help smooth things along.<br />
Sure, there are bigger, more serious, more critical moments in which people come of age. But there are also these moments, littler things that happen in the daily business of life, which reinforce the message.<br />
This is what being a grown-up is...growing stronger and growing together.KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-61228064915715278462011-02-02T18:45:00.000-08:002011-02-02T18:45:15.533-08:00Here's to an early spring...It's Groundhog Day--a major event in my kindergarten world!<br />
In case you missed the news, the snowstorm bearing down on Pennsylvania thoroughly obscured the sun during the ceremony and Paunxataney Phil did not see his shadow. Spring is just around the corner!<br />
And, here at home, as if Mother Nature herself heard the news, the sun started shining this afternoon and it warmed up to a balmy 46 degrees or more this afternoon. This is such a welcome treat at this point in the winter season that, upon arriving home from work, I put on my tennis shoes, bundled up the Mer Bear, grabbed the dog's leash, and went on a walk!<br />
Now, I can readily admit that I am not much of an exercise junkie. I got my fill of cardiovascular training while rowing crew in college and am now fairly content to grumble about my weight while munching on a Hershey kiss. However, in an effort to lose my baby weight last summer, I got hooked on walking.<br />
My routine was simple: load up the van with baby, dog, and stroller in the morning in time to take Greg to work. Then I'd park the van in the bookstore parking lot, unload the crew, pop in my headphones, and hike all over a beautifully deserted college campus. An hour later, Mer's nap was over but Ruffy and I were both refreshed, relaxed, and feeling good about ourselves. <br />
Sadly, the school year has not allowed for this indulgence...and it shows on me, both physically and emotionally. However, the patch of sunshine I followed around the neighborhood today gave me hope that spring is not far away...and that gives me the optimism to handle so much more!KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-36408470505204964342011-01-08T17:48:00.000-08:002011-01-08T17:48:18.849-08:00Oh, she's sticking out her tongue!One of the comments we get most often about Meredith, other than "Look at all that hair!", is "oh, she's sticking out her tongue!" This is primarily related to her hypotonia, or low-muscle tone, since it takes work to hold your tongue inside your mouth. It is probably one of the characteristics that is most telling of Meredith's Down syndrome, but, if you don't know a lot about Down syndrome, as I didn't until April, you might just think she's hungry or being cute. However, at our tasting at our local wine shop today, it was Mer's tongue sticking out that led to a wonderfully supportive conversation.<br />
When you begin reading stories about people who have children with Down syndrome, you start hearing about little whispered words of support that they get, from time to time, from other people in the community who are close to someone with Down syndrome. Since social coutesy demands that you don't mention a woman's bump until you know for a fact she's expecting, I have long wondered about these conversations, about the even more sensitive subject of a child's disability, start. It turns out, they start simply and sweetly like this...<br />
Meredith was hanging out in her Baby Bjorn, flirting with our wine shop's owner and some of the other customers while Greg and I sipped a sangiovese. The woman next to me started talking to Mer and about the cute little tongue sticking out of her mouth. I had already mentally composed my response when she added, "My niece did that with her tongue for the longest time too. My sister used to always tap her on the tip of her tongue to get it to go back in." <br />
I adjusted my response. Clearly, here was someone who was familiar with speech therapy and such in young children. Maybe I could explain about the hypotonia...maybe I could ask if her niece was still doing the tongue thing...I decided to go out on a limb...<br />
"Meredith has Down syndrome," I started. <br />
I had barely finished my sentence when she started hers..."So does my niece." <br />
She had known. And she had reached out. <br />
Gracefully. <br />
Without offense. <br />
And over a glass of wine!KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-89896729191883795412010-11-08T17:53:00.000-08:002010-11-08T17:53:20.786-08:00It Takes A Village...to Raise a Parent'Tis the season for giving thanks, and, as I watch my friends posting 30 days of thanks on facebook, I reflect on those in my life I am grateful for, especially, this year, my ever-growing support system.<br />
I am grateful for my babysitter, who lovingly cares for Meredith, practices her exercises with her, and offers just a smidge of helpful motherly insight from time to time. (Did you know that diaper rash is more likely to occur when your child is on an antibiotic?)<br />
I am grateful for my boss, and my husband's boss, both of whom have been more than generous and flexible in allowing us, even encouraging us, to manipulate our schedules and take time to attend appointments with Meredith.<br />
I am grateful for the medical practitioners we interact with regularly...doctors and nurses who dote on our daughter and therapists who guide us in supporting and challenging Mer to reach her greatest potential.<br />
I am grateful for my in-laws who have always welcomed me in to their family but whose embrace has been even tighter this year.<br />
I am grateful for my parents who work hard to stay close, despite the miles between us, and who make family get-togethers a blast.<br />
I am grateful for my brother, who has always been fun to be around, but even more so as he gets older and more, dare I say it, mature. Mer is lucky to have him as one of her uncles!<br />
I am grateful for my sister, who is one of my best friends, and who, along with her girlfriend, overwhelm me with their unconditional love of Meredith.<br />
I am grateful for my daughter who teaches me to slow down, relax, and enjoy the little things.<br />
And, I am grateful for my husband, whose patience calms me down and helps me focus on what's important. He supports me in projects I undertake, understands when I need a break, and laughs at me when 2 years later it's still only half finished. :-) I am more and more lucky to have him every day.KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-21129386930638893292010-10-31T08:53:00.000-07:002010-10-31T08:53:41.673-07:00Trick-or-TreatAmoxicillin is a trick. Blue eyes and beautiful fall days are such a treat!<br />
So, last Friday (a week ago) we took Mer for her 6-month well-baby check at our wonderful doctor's office. She weighed in, in the fly-weight division, at 11 lbs 14 oz, which puts her in about the 35th percentile for weight on the Down syndrome growth chart for girls. This is a little bit lower than her last visit, but our doctor is FABULOUS about reminding us that the curves on growth charts are made of averages of LOTS of babies and that each individual's chart usually looks more like a series of stairsteps, with sudden spikes and then more flat lines. This is, he says, probably a flatline time for her with a growth spurt right around the corner. What he was more concerned about, however, was the yellow gunk that has been coming out of her nose for the past two weeks. He quickly put her on a prescription for amoxicillin.<br />
Now, those of you who have children know that giving a baby medicine is not necessarily the easiest thing in the world. (Those of you who have pets can imagine...it's really very similar!) We were just figuring out a system, on Friday, when Greg discovered a slight rash on Mer's torso. By Saturday, we were on the phone with the doctor as the rash had spread to her face and legs. Turns out, it took a week to show up, but Meredith has her first medical allergy, and we will be reminded of it for the next 3-6 days until it fades away.<br />
The treat for the weekend, however, is that the allergy did not really explode until yesterday evening, so we were able to enjoy 2 beautiful days this weekend out "trick-or-treating" with Meredith. Friday evening we met up with some of Greg's colleagues to explore the Halloween festivities that JMU's Greek population has to offer...mostly bucketfuls of candy for every child in site! But there was warm apple cider for the grown-ups...and lots of 20-somethings ooh-ing and ahh-ing over all the kids in costumes while silently either wishing for cuties of their own or getting a real-life reminder to pick up some birth-control before going out to party that evening. Saturday morning we met up with a friend and her six-month old son to take in the sights in downtown Harrisonburg. Koala Meredith and her bumble-bee friend had a great time hugging each other in their soft and furry costumes and playing with the crunchy leaves around Court Square.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSW-VWgf2GyGdE88RmBZ8Si_NcvhLvyjlz7LoZA2q4gdVoeCqOYmlQ1EFVaGTR5Bhq037khAUbNf7t5IsqQPCfSwS0p2WqF2tJGr4YD8-XrOGeN0yRoPiFj6La1YSXVkQCAScx1f0QTSv6/s1600/IMG_0317.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" nx="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSW-VWgf2GyGdE88RmBZ8Si_NcvhLvyjlz7LoZA2q4gdVoeCqOYmlQ1EFVaGTR5Bhq037khAUbNf7t5IsqQPCfSwS0p2WqF2tJGr4YD8-XrOGeN0yRoPiFj6La1YSXVkQCAScx1f0QTSv6/s320/IMG_0317.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Bonus treat: we also visited the pediatric opthamologist about a week ago. Mer's eyes are in pretty good shape. She has a slight misalignment, but nothing that is likely to affect her vision at this time. Regarding the color, however, he said that a higher than average number of children with Down syndrome have blue eyes. Basing our previous predictions on her eye-color off of the <a href="http://anthro.palomar.edu/mendel/mendel_2.htm">Punnett squares</a> you may have practiced in high-school biology, which said, in short, that brown eyes are dominant, we figured her eyes would be changing over soon. However, it turns out that that extra chromosome does some funny things, including things that affect eye color. Our opthamologist seems to think it quite likely that her baby blues are here to stay! :-)KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-58760840144490664472010-10-18T18:38:00.000-07:002010-10-18T18:38:45.482-07:00Pockets and PocketbooksIt's amazing how much your pockets, and your purse, can reveal about your life. For example, at 4:30 today, at the height of their usefulness, my jean pockets contained: my cell phone and jump drive, a jumbo paperclip, a confiscated paperclip, doctor's orders to get Mer's blood drawn, a post-it with directions and phone number for the hospital where we had to get the blood work done, a baby size hair elastic and hair bow, and a confiscated silly band from school. Not bad, huh?<br />
I've been using my pockets for storage more lately as I'm finding myself torn between bags. Pre-baby I carried a purse and over-the-shoulder work bag every day and that worked well. Work and my personal life were separate, yet I didn't have to sacrifice any of the essentials. Now, with a diaper bag in the picture, the purse has been relegated to a back shelf for special occasions. Even so, it seems like carrying a diaper bag, work bag, and pump into school every day would be overkill, so I'm trying to just switch the essentials (phone and wallet) from diaper bag to work bag as necessary...and often they just wind up in my pockets instead.<br />
I feel like the bag I carry says a lot about the role I'm playing in my life. For example, this weekend, I had the opportunity to be footloose and fancy free with a small black and white clutch a girl-friend gave me as a bridesmaid gift. I felt sophisticated, trendy, and feminine carrying it...a nice break! <br />
With conferences and assessments demanding a lot of time from work over the past two weeks, my work bag has been a constant commuting companion...and my mind has been as weighed down with it as my shoulder has been. <br />
My new favorite bag to carry, however, is my diaper bag. It is one thing, that in preparing for my baby, I picked out and bought with very little input from others. It is my first Vera Bradley and it is organized with lots of baby paraphernalia that leaves me feeling in control and actively involved in being a mother. I loved carrying it everywhere I went this summer...around campus on my morning walk, to the grocery store on the weekend, and to Target every chance I got. I got a feeling of super-mom power when I was able to get the bag, Mer's car-seat, and our dog Ruffy into the car in a single trip when it was time to go pick Greg up in the evenings. <br />
Since I went back to work, there are many changes in our life, and many times when I feel like I'm not as much of a mother as I'd like. Now that most of our weekday trips are limited to to and from work, my diaper bag doesn't always even make it into the car...and, silly as it seems, sometimes I get a little sad thinking about all that simple decision seems to say.KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-4970836138545147812010-09-21T17:46:00.000-07:002010-09-21T17:46:49.517-07:00Showing off...I know there are a lot of proud moms out there. And, I know that not everyone is totally into every little milestone that babies reach...even MY baby! (gasp!) However, I have to tell you that I feel a strong need to brag about my baby, show her cuteness to random strangers passing by, and let others soak up a little bit of her snuggli-ness. I may come off as a bit self-absorbed and pushy, but here is why...<br />
I want to build up a "bank reserve of acceptance" of some sort in my heart for my daughter. <br />
Even in this age of increased education about Down syndrome and ever-expanding opportunities for individuals with Down syndrome (and other intellectual disabilities), prejudice still exists. Begin just by considering the percentage of women who, when told that their unborn baby has Down syndrome, choose to abort the pregnancy--a number that I've read is around 90%. Further, consider how you might feel if time and attention was being "taken away" from your child at school because a child with a disability was in the classroom. I hope that you can see how your child might grown in their acceptance of others through this experience, but I imagine it might challenge you in some ways.<br />
Anyway, I mention this because a friend recently shared with me some hurtful comments she overheard being made about her child. I know that in the future I will have my own batch of comments to face. And, I know that there will even be times when I won't be able to shield Meredith from these remarks...there will be some that she will hear and have to overcome on her own.<br />
But...she's so perfect! She is so beautiful! She is making wonderful progress! I imagine that, at this point, unless we've shared with you that she has Down syndrome or you frequently work with children with disabilities, you probably wouldn't even know. So, right now, please indulge me. Listen to me talk about all the little stepping stones we pass along--rolling over, laughing, and maybe even starting food soon! Let me enjoy the random strangers in Target who stop me and say, "Oh, she has such gorgeous hair!" And help us build our "reserves" so that when the difficult times come, we have a cushion of positivity to help us bounce back.KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-29671662845742812052010-09-06T17:44:00.000-07:002010-09-06T17:44:34.716-07:00What is love?WHAT IS LOVE?<br />
Oh baby don't hurt me. Don't hurt me, no more. <br />
WHAT IS LOVE?<br />
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Sorry...just had to get that little lyrical break out of my system. :-)<br />
Now, more seriously...<br />
Love has been on my mind a lot lately. I recently had a good friend ask me what I thought love meant, and I have a bridesmaid's dress hanging in my closet for a wedding in October. So, I've been thinking a lot about my relationship with my husband, what our love is, and how incredibly lucky I am.<br />
So, I think that love often gets mixed up with a whole lot of other things, especially lust and romance. You've all heard the lecture given to teenagers about love vs. lust, so there's no need to repeat that. But, I think romance is sneakier, and sometimes it sweeps people off their feet and gets mistaken for love. Chocolate, roses, chocolate roses...that stuff is all wonderful, but it's romance...the glitzy make-up the love wears when you just meet someone or when you're dating. Romance is important and there are days when love should wear that make-up. But I think love is more of a "I just rolled out of bed on Saturday morning" kind of thing. It's not always something you want to share with the public, but it is a simple thing to treasure, and a blessing to be grateful for just the same.<br />
When I think about my marriage with my husband, there are a couple of key phrases that seem to sum it all up for us. This is our love:<br />
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"Nobody has more fun than us!" Love is making the monotonous fun. It is those silly little spontaneous moments, on the way back from the grocery store or while painting the living room, that build your relationship. They are inside jokes and plans gone awry. Try explaining these moments to anyone, or even trying to recall one to share with a friend, and you'll be stuck. But, they are money in the bank of your relationship.<br />
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"Honey, troubles!" My sister just reminded me of this one this weekend. Last spring, when my hormones were ALL out of wack due to pregnancy, there was this one night where the toilet got clogged. I waited and then gave it the ever-optimistic second flush, hoping that just a little more power would suck everything down. Of course, it didn't, and the water started rising and spilling out over the toilet. This is when I yelled the only thing that came to my mind: "Honey, troubles!" And of course, my hubby came running. I started mopping things up, only to knock over the shelf behind the toilet. The adventure finally ended with glass blobs, that had been sitting on a shelf, splattering all over the bathroom, on to the lid of the toilet (where you can still see the scrapes), and on to the floor. My point of all this, however, is that there will be rough times. And there will be times when it seems like it's just one rough thing after another. However, by calling on each other, and teaming up, you might be able to get through your adventure with a minimal number of tears.<br />
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"We make a good team." I feel like we've been practicing this phrase a lot lately, as new parents. In fact, I had thought that it was a relatively new phase of our relationship. But, then I remembered that this is actually how we got together. We started dating while teaming up as RAs to organize activities while in college. One of us had the big idea, the other ironed out the details. One did posters and publicity, the other got the money and bought supplies. We have just taken these practices and expanded them to meet the needs of our relationship. In a relationship, you really have to be able to share things with your partner...the silly little thoughts inside your head, the great big worries in your heart, and even the chores around the house. You have to be willing to let yourself go a little bit and know that your partner will be there to catch you. Often, this is harder than being there to do the catching. But, in being vulnerable, you learn to become stronger together.<br />
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So, dear friends, in your relationship, know that there will be moments when you will scream, "Honey, troubles." However, if you work together, and celebrate the fact that you "make a good team", hopefully you'll have many, many moments where you find yourself thinking, "Nobody has more fun that us!"KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5762614681984374646.post-91380296943421208222010-08-31T18:27:00.000-07:002010-08-31T18:27:15.817-07:00It is TOO SOON to think about kindergarten...So, I'm having an internal conflict about a student in my class. This child has been a slight challenge for the past week and a half, and it's not his fault. He has some special needs which are being addressed by an IEP right away and his mother is advocating for him to attend a special program in the district, which, I think, can meet his needs better than I can. But I struggle because I wonder if my daughter will be in his shoes in a few years. <br />
One of our major wishes for Mer right now is to be included in traditional classes as much as possible. Of course, we have very little to base these wishes and hopes on, other than being fairly strong believers in the idea that EVERYONE in a class benefits from the diversity that public education offers. We have no idea what her academic and behavioral strengths will be...and so I need to keep that in mind before I borrow worry. But that's easier said than done...<br />
IEP meetings these days fill me with questions, more personal than professional. I start thinking about Mer. I wonder if she will be able to keep up with her peers behaviorally, not to mention academically. I wonder what services she'll be eligible for. I wonder if we will be able to successfully advocate for an instructional assistant for her and if that would be enough of a support to make her successful in a traditional kindergarten placement. <br />
I also wonder how much of a PITA (pain in the @$$) parent I'm about to become...<br />
I already find myself speaking up more in meetings about students than I have in the past. I worry more about whether parents are understanding all of the information that is being shared with them and if they know what options might be available for their child. I imagine myself sitting in "that chair" at a meeting in the not too distant future, having professionals share their assessments of my child with me, sharing information I already am aware of, but that is still not easy to hear. I hear the "discussion" I fear we will have, pushing for my daughter to receive instruction in the classroom, with her peers, differentiated to meet her needs. <br />
I know we will ask a lot her teachers and the staff at whatever school she may attend in the future. How do I ask this of them, though, when I don't know that I am equipped to handle the child that is in my class now?KMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16093932689981813873noreply@blogger.com1